Sunday, March 9, 2008

You want me to buy WHAT??*

*Pictures have all been removed due to their graphic nature. If you need to have pictures for this post, please picture an absurdly tiny swimsuit with impossible straps. And then make the suit smaller by 40% so that it looks fit for a 4 year old. Now, pretend it is aimed at a teenage girl. That picture should be pretty much everything we encountered today.

By all means, feel free to remind me that I am insane. In addition to PMS, I somehow determined that today would be a perfect day for swimsuit shopping. Now, if the swimsuit were for me, that would be one thing. I have pretty much come to terms with the fact that I am not a size 8 or smaller. Things have drooped and pooched and sagged in all manner of unnatural ways, and my only option when swimsuit season begins (which is nearly year round, if I'm honest), is to try on 5 or 10 horrid things and buy the one that looks the least hideous. Sadly, I can live with that. But the girls suits? ARE you KIDDING me?

Have any of you looked at what Target is offering this year? I know it is naive, but all I want was a one-piece swimsuit which would cover them. And yes, I am aware that is too much to ask. But is doesn't stop me from being grumpy. And it certainly doesn't stop them from being grumpy either. Ellie is too tall for the girls sizes, which still have an iota of a chance of adequate coverage, and in no way fits the older sizes. Even if I could find something modest. Which I can't. Unless you want to go the board shorts/rash guard (with a swimsuit under) approach. Which she doesn't. And Rebi, who is really not wanting to be the "only girl in a dorky one-piece. Can't I just have the tankini? I PROMISE to keep it pulled down". And anything we buy will have to have fabric sewn in somewhere in order to fill the gaping holes that spill cleavage.

And parents buy this for their girls. On purpose.

So, I need tips for modest swimsuits. We spent ages looking last year and found almost nothing. I can get a Land's End suit for Rebi. There are 2 she likes, and at $100 each, I'm sure they are actually made from solid gold. But, I am not spending $100 on a swimsuit Ellie will grow out of by June. Help. Anyone? Help?

8 comments:

Christina said...

I was thinking Lands End right up until the last paragraph. But yes they are very expensive. Although worth it.

Another good reason to have only boys. Trunks and rash gaurds are a way of life here.

Mom said...

Ah, swimsuits. Don't we just love them! Even the one piece ones can be pretty miniscule. On the cruise, I noticed a lot of girls and women wore tank tops and shorts over their suits. Of course, many others may as well have been naked. Try to get them to agree to trunks and rash gaurds, even if they are girls.

Anonymous said...

Hey Melissa ... i know there is some site out there that's not lands end that does modesit suites... it's mod something or other or maybe modest clothing ...

I'm working on remembering.

Cathie

katzbox said...

wow...I'm still recovering from purchasing a swim suit from the late 90s...I was in the dressing room (which should be padded during swim suit season, just to make the freak out less painful) using those hideous 3 way mirrors...some kind of twisted humor on eternity...now I just use the shorts and built in bra tops over them...

sqtana said...

Hey Melissa...You should try Shade Clothing, I know they carry swim suits. Down East Basices may also have some. I buy the girls long tanks and camis from them.

The Slusser Family said...

http://www.modbeclothing.com/

Tada! An answer to all your woes!
LOVE!

frizzlefry said...

OK, but I am having a TERRIBLE time with the thought of spending $50 on a swimsuit TOP. Isn't even a whole suit and it's $50!!!

AARGH.. .

Michelle said...

miniBoden.com has some very cute one-pieces for less than $30. Also, I recently saw some cute Speedo options at Sam's Club. And Gap has a few decent 1-pc options as well.